checked out.

donut dinner

i don't know what it is, but in this moment i feel more independent and self-sufficient than i ever have. i don't know if it's the start of a new quarter, a new year, a new future, but something has given me a fresh, healthy awareness of what i want out of life.

so, change is in the air and i feel like moving to another blog "community", but having to come up with an original, clever name for a new blog is more than what i want to deal with right now. i know i have two, maybe three, faithful blog readers, so give me some suggestions. and um, no, tortie, longtoes, and stoner are not acceptable.

MUAHAHAHAHAHA

HELICOPTER GAME

it's official.

I feel at home in Costa Mesa.

The helicopter with its searchlight was hovering around my house for a good 5 minutes before I even realized that I had been staring at it the whole time. This is probably the 8th helicopter sighting I've seen since I've moved in.

I'm in a good place right now.

so. see you next year.

Arrrr-gyle.

I've always just let things happen to me. I kinda just wait around until something falls into my lap. On the whole, it's been a very unproductive way of living. So, screw new year's. I'm going to resolve this now.

I tried cooking a real dinner for myself this evening for the first time in about 3 weeks. In the process I burnt the first batch of rice and then the smoke detector went off. I was happy to eat the second batch undercooked.

It's nice to be told that you've made someone's day because of a very insignificant thing you happened to do.

It seems to be a difficult transition from procrastinating and doing nothing during the quarter to doing absolutely nothing without the guilt during winter break...I can't even transition smoothly from thought to thought.

I'm going to the Happiest Place on Earth tomorrow. It's about time.

bran muffins

right now is one those moments where all i want to do is consume every one of those academic journals with the pretty covers, learn some italian vocabulary, look up duck recipes, and start doing yoga again. right here in the library.

anything but write this paper.

i had ALL weekend to do it. but no, i'm an idiot.

why am i so distracted lately? the other day i sat at a stop sign waiting for a green light during the span of two songs on the radio.

i wish this phase of monotony and apathy towards life would pass. speaking of things passing, i slowly rose to conciousness this morning to the sound of voices telling me to buy a miracle pill that will clean my colon and, ultimately, improve my life. i listened to that damned informercial for possibly 20 minutes with my face in the pillow until i found the will power to fish around the sheets for the remote to turn it off.  thinking about the 10 pounds of fecal matter clogging up my colon is NOT the way i want to start my day.